Every once in a while, even Little Miss Sunshine decides to look at the world and be like WTF. Today, I'm going there.
1. If you drive a two seated convertable, I'm going to make a few conclusions about you without knowing anything about you at all. 1) You're probably having a midlife crisis 2) Most likely your a pretentious person 3) Both 1 and 2 could possibly apply to you at the same time. I always see middle aged men driving these cars bald head gleaming possibly with a middle aged woman with a baseball cap and I just want to scream "Who exactly do you think your kidding? Not me buddy, not me." This car is usually not red, no they want to be more subtle. Opting for silver or black, they think that no one will notice they're not twenty-five, or hot, or interesting, but dear two seated convertable owner, I'm on to you. You, my friend (heck, you're not my friend, I'm making fun of you), are in the middle of a midlife crisis. Save your money, go to therapy, you will never be in your twenties again.
2. The Rockford Register Star. If you live in R-town, you'll understand what I'm about to snark about. The writing is terrible, the facts in the stories are worse, sometimes when I've gone to an event they have written about I wonder if the reporter majored in fictional writing. Now, I'm a lawyer, I don't think there's such thing as an unbiased resitation of any fact pattern, but let's at least try to pretend, since last time I checked that's what journalists strive to do (that's what they "take pride in"). Headlines like "Backers: Firefighter being treated unfairly" and "200 in March 'Want Justice'" probably don't convey that whole unbiased thing your going for. Not to mention, the Editorial Board hates public workers which leads me to my next snarky remark.
3. I know the Economy sucks. I get it. However, I don't understand for the life of me why we must take so many pot shots at anyone who works for the government. Here's the deal, those government workers when the economy is good don't get raises and bonuses like the folks out there in the public sector. No one leads the charge to raise our pay. But let me tell you, as soon as the economy tanks, all I hear is how everyone wants the people with government jobs to suffer just as badly as they are. Guess what folks, even when the economy is bad, you still make more than I do at my little government job. Try to hire a lawyer who will work for roughly $25.00 an hour and if they work more than forty hours a week, which they all do, make less than that hourly. I challenge you to go call an attorney and ask if they will work for that hourly. My bet is that they A) laugh till they cry and/or B) hang up on you. And if you want the market forces to work in the criminal justice system people, business is booming as the economy is tanking. There's more business, more work, so if we look at it as a business, everyone in the criminal justice system should make more. Bottom line, don't be a hater.
4. I promise Obama is not trying to euthanize your grandmother. Health care should be a right not a privilege and as someone who has health insurance let me enlighten everyone else that also has it. Until we do something to reform the current health care situation, those with health insurance will continue to pay for those who don't have it and be at the mercy of people who want nothing more than to try to figure out how not to pay out to providers and stick you with the cost as well. I keep hearing I don't want the government between me and my doctor, folks, right now we have your health insurance provider between you and your doctor. Reform is needed, we can all agree on that. Let's take that common ground we have and work for a solution without worrying about which party is going to get the credit for it or how much you like or dislike President Obama.
5. Customer service...it makes me want to come back to your business. What doesn't make me want to come back to your business and spend my hard earned albeit little money. If you're a hostess at Chili's your entire job is to welcome me to the restaurant and seat me as quickly as possible. It's not acceptable to tell me "Just a minute" after you've been three feet away from me in a lobby with only one other couple (sitting down waiting to be sat) for the last five minutes (you've already had just a minute) and when you ask where I want to sit because it would be in your best interest not to make some snotty retort back to me when I point out that there are plenty of open seats I can visually see in both the dining room and the bar. I don't want to come back to Chili's to eat in the restaurant (I'll just order out my food from there and you won't see my money when you get tipped out by the servers later that night) and odds are I'm probably going to tell your manager how you can't even say "Hello, Welcome to Chili's" when I walked through the door. Additionally, if I'm calling your business I expect to A) not have it ring 25 times before you answer B)Talk to a human being C) to be transferred to the right department D)for that phone not to have to ring 25 or more times before someone answers or I finally have to start the process over because I can't stand to hear the phone ring one more time. Dear Walmart, you failed that test miserable as well as your other axises of evil such as Comcast, Nicor, and ComEd.
So there's a little bit of snark for you, sometimes it just feels good to let it out.
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Like a waterfall in slow motion, Part One
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